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There are days when the words don’t want to come.
When the body speaks louder than the mind and the world feels still, almost silent.
Today is one of those days.
Sometimes it feels as if both the body and the words need rest – as if stillness itself wants to speak.
Maybe I need to step back from the words for a while, let the body have its say and let the lake, the wind and the silence take their place.

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Ideas are not plentiful today. It feels as if the words have run out.
It might be because of the pain in my neck, or simply because I have nothing new to tell.

In earlier years, this would have frightened me. The thoughts would come: have my words run out? Do I need help to find them again?
But now I simply feel that maybe I need to rest from the words.
Because they usually show themselves to be there, just behind the noise.
They haven’t yet found their way into this morning – maybe they’ll arrive another day.
Sometimes the words just need to rest in the body, to be rocked into a quiet song.

By the Lake

Yesterday morning at the lake. The jetties lay still and the world held its breath. Here, both the words can rest and the body can speak.

I went down to the lake to bathe.
Only one of us “bathing sisters” swam; the rest of us stood with our hands above the water, letting our bodies cool down.
I was first into the water and first back out again.

The feeling in my body after a swim is always wonderful.
For a short while the pain disappears and my whole body fights to regain its warmth.
Energy rushes through me and my thoughts slow down.

Even though the swims are wonderful and give me strength, I don’t think I’ll swim today.
I’m thinking that I probably need to go to the health centre and get my neck sorted out. It’s been almost a week and a half now and the pain isn’t going away.
Maybe I can get something stronger than Alvedon or Ipren, because right now it feels as if I can’t stand it any longer.
I thought it was just a bit of neck pain, but the pain keeps changing and gives strange sensations in my body.

Reflection

In the past I would have been afraid that my words had run out.
Now I think that perhaps it’s just like the body – it needs recovery to have strength again.
The words aren’t resting to disappear; they’re resting to come back with new force.

AHA

It struck me today that words and the body are alike in some ways.
When I give them rest, when I allow space for silence, both the words and the body find their way back into their own flow.

Between the Lines – My Voice

Between the pain, the swims and the silence lives a longing for balance.
To dare to pause, to dare to be without words for a while – that is perhaps also a kind of strength.
Life goes on anyway, and one day both the body and the words will awaken again.

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Final Reflection

It’s as if the body and the words work together in their own way.
When one needs rest, the other carries the stillness.
I think maybe this is how life tells me to slow down a little,
to let the morning be quiet without rushing anything forward.

Perhaps it’s not about finding my way back to the words,
but about letting them find their way back to me – when the time is right.

I live today, right now. History teaches me to rest in body and soul. Tomorrow waits out there in the future – a day I cannot live today. But what I do now can grow into something tomorrow. Right now is always, because this is where life is lived.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson