Etikett: Gratitude Sida 1 av 2

A full moon in a clear blue sky – a symbol of leaving the victim role behind and letting the past rest while the light guides the way forward.

Leaving the Victim Role – Choosing Freedom and Presence

Leaving the victim role isn’t about denying what happened – it’s about understanding that the past doesn’t have to shape the future.
In this post, I reflect on how we can let go of what once was, meet our inner child with warmth, and choose thoughts that open the way to freedom, gratitude, and life in the present moment.

The moon reminds me that everything changes – the past can rest while new light takes form.

Read this post in Swedish →Lämna offerrollen – när historien får vila och jag väljer att leva nu


Morning, coffee, and a new beginning

My coffee stands beside me. The cat has gone out for her morning walk, and the silence inside feels calm and safe.
It’s one of those quiet mornings when something inside you has shifted, even though the world outside looks the same.

Yesterday… yes, everything that was yesterday, last week, last year, or even when I was little – all of that belongs to history now.
It’s already happened. I can’t change it, undo it, or polish away what still aches.

I’ve written before about how thoughts influence emotions in my post Living with Positive Psychology. It’s about consciously choosing where to place your focus – just like I do here.


When the past whispers – and how hard it can be to leave the victim role

I’ve spent many hours, maybe years, thinking about what happened back then.
Some memories hurt deeply; others carried guilt or shame.
When I thought about them, I got stuck in the same loop – same thoughts, same feelings, same pain.

It was like wearing an old cardigan – cold, itchy, and faintly smelling of something forgotten.
Still, I kept it on because it was familiar.
I thought, “I feel this way because that happened.”

A knitted cardigan hanging in soft morning light – a symbol of leaving the victim role behind and choosing warmth, self-love and a new way of living.
The old cardigan still hangs there, but the morning light reminds me – I can choose something new.

And so, I held on.
The cardigan became part of me.
The victim role too.

The victim role is like a quiet thief.
It steals joy, piece by piece.
It whispers that you can’t, that you’re stuck, that you’re helpless.
And it makes you believe someone else must save you.

But that old cardigan can feel kind of cozy too, can’t it?
It smells familiar, feels safe – almost soft against the skin.
There’s comfort in the known, like an old map we’ve memorized by heart.
But that map doesn’t lead anywhere anymore.
It takes us back to the same place, again and again.

And I want to move forward now.

Question for you:
Have you ever noticed yourself holding on to a thought that only hurts you?
Which “cardigan” do you keep wearing, even though you no longer need it?

The cardigan becomes a symbol for all the things we carry – what once felt safe but now holds us back.
Leaving the victim role begins right there, in the awareness that what feels safe isn’t always what helps us grow.


When I started listening to myself

One day, I grew tired of feeling cold in that old cardigan.
That was the day I met the curious Carina within me – the part of me that wants to understand, grow, take responsibility, and feel well.

I realized the past didn’t have to be my prison anymore.
It could become my teacher.

What hurts today often resembles what once hurt before.
Those are my triggers – small messages from the body whispering:
“Here lies something you haven’t yet healed.”

Each time I pause, breathe, and stay with what I feel instead of hiding from it, something quiet happens.
I grow.


Meeting the child within

I’ve realized I must give that little girl inside me what she never received.
The one who was scared, sad, unseen – she doesn’t have to wait for someone else to comfort her anymore.

I can place her on my lap, hold her close, and say:

“It wasn’t your fault.
You were worthy of love, warmth, and safety.
You were worthy of being loved – exactly as you are.”

When I’ve done that enough times, I can finally lay down the cardigan.

Question for you:
Can you see your own inner child?
What would you want to tell them – if you could speak today?

I write more about this in to heal you self.


Choosing a new sweater – and a new way of thinking

I’m trading that old cardigan for a soft wool sweater – one that warms instead of weighing me down.
The difference is, this sweater is one I’ve chosen myself.

It’s woven from awareness, responsibility, and gratitude.
From thoughts that strengthen rather than sting.

I can’t change what was, but I can change how I relate to it.
When old thoughts appear, I ask myself:
“Does this thought serve me right now?”

If the answer is no – I change it.
I choose a thought that brings warmth instead of cold.

Question for you:
Which thought would you like to start choosing more often?
One that makes you lighter, calmer – or simply more present right now?


Choosing to leave the victim role and live freely

Today, I choose happiness – not because everything is easy, but because I know I can.
I choose gratitude. I choose to meet myself with gentleness.

I no longer have to feel bad just because something once hurt.
Because now I know I have the right to feel good – despite it all.

When I decided to leave the victim role behind, life slowly began to feel lighter.

Right now, I sit here with coffee in hand and peace in my body.
I feel like my own best friend.

And that – that is freedom.


Reflection – Leaving the victim role in your own story

This is a text about outgrowing your history.
About no longer wearing the cardigan of the victim role, but instead choosing the sweater that truly warms.
To understand that it’s not what happened, but how we think about it, that shapes our day.

If you enjoy this kind of writing, you might also like Good Morning – What Do You Think About the New Layout?, where I write about how silence can teach us something about ourselves.


From my therapist training – a reflection

In my studies to become a certified counselor, I’m learning how thoughts, emotions, and bodily memories are intertwined.
When I write about leaving the victim role, it also mirrors what we practice in therapy – helping ourselves and others take responsibility for feelings, recognize triggers, and choose new ways of thinking.
Writing becomes my own conversation – a way to listen to myself and grow.

This text is about the courage to leave the victim role behind and embrace the possibility of living fully, here and now.

Between the Lines – What the Text Reveals

This is a text about the courage to see yourself without running away.
About daring to let go of what once felt safe, but now keeps you from moving forward.
It tells of how healing begins in something as quiet as a thought being replaced, a feeling being allowed to breathe, a choice made right here and now.

Between the lines, it is also about me – a woman who no longer carries her history as a burden, but as wisdom.
I have learned to leave the victim role without denying the pain.
To see it as a teacher, not a judge.
And it is in that stillness – between the coffee, the words, and the breath – that life truly happens.


malix.se/ Carina Ikonen Nilsson

“Yesterday’s cardigan might still hang there, breathing history – but it’s airing in today’s light and can change into the future.
Maybe it will be unraveled and knitted again, in today’s colors and feelings.”
— Carina Ikonen Nilsson


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Lit candles in a window surrounded by green plants – a quiet morning symbol of structure and balance in everyday life.

Structure and Balance in Everyday Life – A Morning Reflection

A slightly different morning at home. Today, there will be no swim, because a parent-teacher meeting on Teams awaits. The missed swim instead gave way to a long, warm shower — not at all the same as walking down to the lake, but still lovely. Perhaps that’s what it’s all about — finding structure and balance in everyday life, even when the day doesn’t turn out as planned.

Read this post in Swedish → Struktur och balans i vardagen – en morgonreflektion


Morning Without the Lake – But Not Without Stillness

A warm cup of coffee on a quiet morning – a moment of structure and balance in everyday life.

My coffee stands beside me as my thoughts wander between schoolwork and household tasks. Right now, a bit of anxiety lives in my body — piles of papers waiting to be read and reflected on. I know I need to find structure; however, I don’t want it to become like last time. Back then, I studied around the clock and felt anxious whenever I wasn’t studying.

This time, I want balance. I’ll ask AI to help me create a structure for my studies and everything else that needs doing. What did we actually do before AI? How did we manage to fit the puzzle pieces of life together?


Studies, Solitude and a New Kind of Companion in the Search for Structure and Balance in Everyday Life

After the meeting, I’ll return to my reading. The subject interests me, and when it does, words flow more easily. My ADHD helps here — when curiosity takes over, focus follows. But I miss classmates — someone to discuss and practice with. For now, AI has become my conversation partner. It works, but it’s not the same as having another person to share ideas with.

It’s quieter this way. Still, in the quiet, there’s also space to listen inward.

I recently wrote about Living with Positive Psychology.


The Little One, the Room and Everyday Rhythm

Yesterday, my little one wanted to rearrange his room. It happens fast when he does it — furniture moves, but not much else. When I rearrange, I want to clean behind, underneath, and around everything. The small clutter probably slept with him last night. He can sleep with anything — Lego pieces, chips, you name it. Everything except spiders and wasps.

It’s in those small moments that everyday life truly lives. That’s where warmth hides — right in the middle of all the stress.


Thoughts of Hugo and the Ache of Longing

Yesterday, I saw on Instagram that little Hugo, my grandson, was sick.
It feels strange to only learn what happens in my grandchildren’s lives through social media. We live just a mile apart, yet contact travels through a screen. He’s grown so much now. I imagine his words are clear, that you can understand everything he says.

Those thoughts hurt, but I try to turn them around: it’s good that he gets to rest while he’s ill.
My little one. I would have liked to bring ice cream and a comic — the kind of things you bring to someone who’s sick. But some wishes have to remain just that — wishes.


A New Day, a New Choice

Today is the first day of the rest of my life, and therefore a reminder that change starts now.
A good day is something you create yourself, regardless of what happens.
Because what truly matters is not what happens — but how we choose to respond to it.


AHA – Between the Lines of Structure and Balance in Everyday Life

Between the lines, this text is about daring to find balance when life tilts.
It’s about living with ADHD and learning to manage what might otherwise take over.
It’s also about longing — for closeness with my son and grandchildren, but also for the presence of a study partner to share ideas with. And about the ability to shift perspective, to find gratitude in the middle of absence.
It’s a story of self-awareness, acceptance and small victories in everyday life.


Reflection – Finding Structure and Balance in Everyday Life

Maybe that’s how life teaches us: sometimes we have to give something up to rediscover ourselves.
Today I choose to skip the swim but instead create stillness.
It’s in those small choices — between the shower, the coffee, and the thoughts — that life truly happens.


What I’m Grateful for Today

This morning, I began by thanking life for letting me wake up to a new day, even without the swim.
I’m grateful for the chance to breathe in this morning, for the warm water running from the tap, and for the joy of a long shower. Not everyone appreciates that simple pleasure — but I do.
I’m also grateful that I dared to begin this education, even though it awakens both performance and anxiety.
Even my anxiety gets a thank-you today — it reminds me that I’m human, alive, and still learning.
And I’m grateful that Instagram exists — because without it, I wouldn’t even have seen a picture of little Hugo or known that he was sick. It hurts, but it also heals — because through the screen, I still get to see him, to know he’s there, in the middle of life.


Questions for You, Dear Reader

How do you find structure and balance in everyday life?
When life feels heavy, what helps you return to calm?
Can you relate to the wish to be enough — and the need to rest?

Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments. I read every one of them.


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Subscribe to malix.se here


malix.se/ Carina Ikonen Nilsson

Live today. Dare to feel life, and let life teach you.
Yesterday rests behind us, having taught us what it could.
Tomorrow is not yet a memory, nor something we know.
Right now — this is where we can live and breathe.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson


Person wrapped in a towel sitting on a bench by a quiet lake on a frosty morning after a cold swim, calm air and still reflections in the water.

Living with Positive Psychology – as I See It

Living with positive psychology in everyday life is not about always being happy or pretending that everything is easy. It’s about seeing life with open eyes, meeting challenges with awareness, and choosing to focus on what truly works. Positive psychology in everyday life helps us create meaning, cultivate gratitude, and grow through both the small and the big moments of life.

Read this post in Swedish. ->Att leva med positiv psykologi – som jag ser det


What Positive Psychology Means to Me

Positive psychology isn’t about forcing happiness. For me, it’s a way of living – being present, taking responsibility for my thoughts and emotions, and understanding that life always holds both light and shadow. I may not control what happens, but I can choose how I relate to it.

By practising seeing what works and accepting what hurts, I create balance. It’s not about avoiding difficulties; it’s about finding strength through them.


PERMA – Five Elements of Well-Being

In positive psychology, there’s a concept called the PERMA model, describing five parts of well-being. I think of them as gentle reminders of what helps me feel grounded and alive.

Positive Emotions

Feeling joy and gratitude in daily life matters. It can be as simple as the smell of morning coffee, the stillness of a quiet house, or the way light finds its way through the curtains.

Engagement

When I write, paint, or swim in the lake, time disappears. I become part of the moment, completely absorbed in what I’m doing. That’s where engagement begins – in full presence.

Relationships

Relationships bring meaning to life. Meeting others with honesty, respect, and attentiveness builds trust. Real connection happens when we dare to show who we truly are.

Meaning

Meaning, to me, is living in the direction of what feels important. I find it when I can contribute, write, or connect with others in ways that feel genuine and true.

Accomplishment – to Achieve

Success doesn’t always mean doing something big. For me, it’s the quiet satisfaction of finishing what I’ve started – completing a piece of writing, a course task, or simply keeping up my morning routines. Small steps strengthen my confidence.

Not everything I begin gets finished, but when I do overcome the obstacles and reach the goal, the victory feels even greater. There’s a certain magic in completing something that once felt hard. The journey gives depth to the result, and that’s when I truly feel that I’ve succeeded – not because it’s perfect, but because I stayed with it until the end.


Gratitude and Presence in Everyday Life

Each morning begins with gratitude. I remind myself that I’ve been given a new day, that I get to drink my coffee in peace, and that I’m alive. Focusing on the small things creates a gentle foundation for the day ahead.

This morning, frost covered the ground and the grass crunched under my feet as I walked toward the lake. The air was sharp, and the water felt like glass against my skin. Yet there’s something in that cold that wakes the body completely.
When I step out of the water, the chill of the air meets me with a rush of pure life – the body tingles, awake and vibrant, as if every cell is singing. It’s a kind of addiction, the good kind, one that adds clarity, strength and joy to my days.

When I swim, no matter the season, the world slows down. The cold demands presence, the breath deepens, and silence takes over. It’s my own form of mindfulness, simple and real.

Living with positive psychology in everyday life is about choosing kindness in thought – meeting myself with compassion, even when things don’t go as planned.


Practising Every Day

I try to replace self-criticism with curiosity. When something doesn’t go as expected, I ask what it’s here to teach me.
Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don’t – but every attempt strengthens my ability to stay grounded in myself.

Growth isn’t about being strong all the time. It’s about getting back up, forgiving myself, and continuing with trust.


Choosing My Thoughts

Positive psychology in everyday life isn’t a shortcut to happiness. It’s about awareness.
Choosing my thoughts means taking responsibility for my inner climate. I can’t control everything that happens, but I can influence how I respond.
Each time I notice something good, each time I thank life for what I have, I slowly build inner peace.


Final Words

For me, positive psychology is like building muscles in the soul.
Every time I choose a thought that lifts instead of weighs me down, strength grows from within.
Small choices. Small steps.
And in the end – a path to walk.


Question for You

How do you invite gratitude, meaning and calm into your everyday life?

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malix.se/ Carina Ikonen Nilsson

What we did yesterday leaves traces in today.
We harvest what we sow.
It reminds me that every moment counts – even the smallest ones.
Yesterday rests in history, tomorrow waits ahead,
but right here, where we stand, are the breaths, the conversations, and life itself. – Carina Ikonen Nilsson

A full moon in a clear blue sky – a symbol of leaving the victim role behind and letting the past rest while the light guides the way forward.

Blog Statistics malix.se – October 5 to 11, 2025

When the blog grows – even when I slow down

This week, I haven’t done much. I haven’t shared on Facebook, barely posted on LinkedIn, and I haven’t written anything new.
Still, blog statistics malix.se show that you’ve continued to read, share, and find your way here.
That makes me both moved and curious – because it means the words now live a life of their own. They travel, even when I rest from the keyboard.

If you want to support the blog, you’ll find the PayPal link here.
And you can always subscribe to the blog here to receive new posts directly in your inbox.

Read this post in Swedish ->Veckostatistik malix.se – 5 till 11 oktober 2025


Blog Statistics malix.se – this week in stillness

More than 100,000 views, even though I barely lifted a finger.
That says something about the power of words – once they’ve found their place.

The most-read posts this week were:

  1. Welcome to malix.se – a blog where everyday life can breathe
  2. Gratitude in everyday life – a new morning, a cup of coffee, and the stillness of autumn
  3. When the words rest – and the body speaks
  4. Kay Pollak Workshop Mörkulla – a dream about growing
  5. When the Words Rest – and the Body Speaks (English version)

It feels like a quiet confirmation. These posts all share a theme – stillness, presence, and courage to rest in what is.
Maybe that’s where we meet – in the pause between the words.


Where you’re reading from

Readers from Sweden, the United States, India, Ireland, and Denmark have visited the blog this week.
It’s touching to see how words written in Swedish, later translated into English, can find wings and travel further than I imagined.


Questions for you, dear reader

  • How do you feel when you slow down – can you rest without feeling lazy?
  • Have you noticed that some things grow the most when you stop pushing?
  • Maybe that’s where the quiet magic lives – in the space where we simply are.

Between the Lines – My Voice

The blog grows, not because I push buttons, but because I’ve allowed it to become something genuine.
When you share something real – something that truly feels – it always finds its way to the right people.
It’s the same in life: what’s true doesn’t need to be shouted. It just needs to exist.


AHA – Between the Lines

I’ve realized that my blog is no longer something I need to drive forward.
It’s become a living room – a home where thoughts and feelings can take root.
And sometimes, the greatest growth happens when I do nothing at all.


Reflection

I’m grateful.
For every visit, every click, every moment you’ve paused here.
I haven’t shared, marketed, or tried to push anything – yet the blog is alive.
It makes me think – maybe it’s all about trust.
To let what is meant to grow, grow in its own rhythm.

A warm thank you for visiting my blog and reading my words.
It means more than you know.

malix.se/ Carina Ikonen Nilsson

Yesterday has already settled into history, tomorrow waits a little further ahead.
But right now – this is where life happens.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson


Autumn colors by the lake and an empty pier waiting for the next swim – a quiet morning near Morkulla, reflecting on the Kay Pollak workshop Morkulla.

Kay Pollak Workshop Morkulla – A Dream About Growing

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. Right now is the best day of the rest of my life.
The joy of getting full marks on my first assignment was the beginning. It ended in reflections about a dream. I dream to one day take part in a Kay Pollak workshop at Morkulla.

Läs det här på Svenska ->Kay Pollak workshop Morkulla – en dröm om att växa

A morning swim.

Before I sat down to write this post, I actually made it out for a morning swim.
I have such thoughtful swimming sisters, and today we talked about swim times.
Nothing has changed yet – it’s still light outside – but I think it would suit me better to swim a little later in the mornings.
That will have to wait until it gets darker at dawn.

The swim was wonderful. The air and the water were almost the same temperature, maybe a degree warmer in the lake. 11 degrees Celsius at land and 12 in the water.
It was bubbly, soft, and such a gentle way to wake up.
Autumn colors have started to settle around the lake, painting the scene in warm, quiet beauty.

My first assignment i my therapist training program

I just received the results for my first assignment in my therapist training program.
The maximum score was ten points – and I got them all.

I was so happy that I had to call my husband right away. The first assignment, done and passed.
It might not have been the most difficult task, so maybe others got full marks too.
But still – what joy it brought! It also became proof that I have chosen the right path.

Laptop and coffee cup in the living room where the blog malix.se is open on the screen – a moment of reflection and writing about the Kay Pollak workshop Morkulla.

A quiet morning in my living room. Coffee, words, and the blog – all at once, right where the day begins.


A Kay Pollak Workshop at Morkulla I Would Have Loved to Attend

That wasn’t really what I had planned to write about today.
What caught my attention was a workshop that Kay Pollak will be holding at Morkulla.

I’ve just spent quite a bit of money on the education I’m taking right now, which means I can’t afford to attend this workshop.
But oh, how tempting it would have been.

To spend an entire weekend with others who, like me, strive to live more consciously, honestly, and authentically.
I believe it would have been both exciting and deeply meaningful – to meet people who dare to take off their masks and be completely themselves.


Kay Pollak Workshop Morkulla

I’ve never attended anything quite like that before, but the thought of it stirs something within me.
To live with Kay’s words for an entire weekend – to open channels for new thoughts, to be reminded that thoughts are just thoughts, and that they can be replaced.

Moreover, I often practice questioning my own thoughts:
Are they true? How might someone else see this? What proof do I really have that what I think is true?

It’s an exercise that changes a lot, and perhaps that is the essence of Kay’s philosophy – to dare to choose thoughts that serve you.

Earlier, I wrote about how gratitude in everyday life can transform an entire day.
This reflection feels like a natural continuation of that – seeing how thoughts and gratitude are connected.


Kay Pollak and the Idea of Choosing Thoughts

Many years ago, I attended a lecture where Kay spoke for three or four hours.
What hours they were.

I remember laughing at myself, at my own small limitations – and at the same time, I grew.
Those hours made me grow as a person, as a colleague, and as myself within myself.

By then, I had already read his books and watched his films, but seeing him live, in that very moment when the words happen, was something else entirely.
It was inspiring, warm, and deeply insightful in a way that has stayed with me.


Longing for a Kay Pollak Workshop

I wish I had a few extra thousand kronor right now – I would have gone.
But perhaps another opportunity will come.

One day, I want to sit there in the stillness between words, practicing even more to choose the thoughts that give me energy.
Until then, I continue my journey here – in my studies, in everyday life, and in the words that help me grow.

“I practice replacing the thoughts that don’t serve me with those that help me grow.”


AHA – Between the Lines

It’s easy to think that personal growth requires big steps or trips to new places.
But often, growth begins in the small things – in a thought that changes, in a new way of seeing yourself.
Choosing your thoughts is taking responsibility for your inner life. That’s where transformation begins.


Between the Lines – My Voice

When I wrote this, I felt both gratitude and longing.
Gratitude for having come this far, for studying something that feels right in my heart.
But also longing – for deeper conversations, more genuine meetings, and to keep growing in authenticity.
Maybe that’s where I am right now – in the middle of a movement toward something larger.


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Question for You

Have you ever attended a workshop or lecture that truly changed something in you?
Or, like me, have you longed to take part in something but had to wait?
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.


Live today, right now.
Yesterday no longer exists, except in traces of what was.
I can’t redo anything from yesterday – but today, right now, I have the chance to influence tomorrow.
It’s in all the “nows” that I live and breathe.

– Carina Ikonen Nilsson


My bathing bag inside the small red bathhouse by the lake – a quiet moment before the water, where stillness and the body meet.

When the Words Rest – and the Body Speaks

There are days when the words don’t want to come.
When the body speaks louder than the mind and the world feels still, almost silent.
Today is one of those days.
Sometimes it feels as if both the body and the words need rest – as if stillness itself wants to speak.
Maybe I need to step back from the words for a while, let the body have its say and let the lake, the wind and the silence take their place.

Läs det här på Svenska ->När orden vilar – och kroppen ropar

Ideas are not plentiful today. It feels as if the words have run out.
It might be because of the pain in my neck, or simply because I have nothing new to tell.

In earlier years, this would have frightened me. The thoughts would come: have my words run out? Do I need help to find them again?
But now I simply feel that maybe I need to rest from the words.
Because they usually show themselves to be there, just behind the noise.
They haven’t yet found their way into this morning – maybe they’ll arrive another day.
Sometimes the words just need to rest in the body, to be rocked into a quiet song.


By the Lake

Wooden jetties by the lake on a quiet autumn morning, where stillness rests and the body speaks. A place for rest and reflection.

Yesterday morning at the lake. The jetties lay still and the world held its breath. Here, both the words can rest and the body can speak.

I went down to the lake to bathe.
Only one of us “bathing sisters” swam; the rest of us stood with our hands above the water, letting our bodies cool down.
I was first into the water and first back out again.

The feeling in my body after a swim is always wonderful.
For a short while the pain disappears and my whole body fights to regain its warmth.
Energy rushes through me and my thoughts slow down.

Even though the swims are wonderful and give me strength, I don’t think I’ll swim today.
I’m thinking that I probably need to go to the health centre and get my neck sorted out. It’s been almost a week and a half now and the pain isn’t going away.
Maybe I can get something stronger than Alvedon or Ipren, because right now it feels as if I can’t stand it any longer.
I thought it was just a bit of neck pain, but the pain keeps changing and gives strange sensations in my body.


Reflection

In the past I would have been afraid that my words had run out.
Now I think that perhaps it’s just like the body – it needs recovery to have strength again.
The words aren’t resting to disappear; they’re resting to come back with new force.


AHA

It struck me today that words and the body are alike in some ways.
When I give them rest, when I allow space for silence, both the words and the body find their way back into their own flow.


Between the Lines – My Voice

Between the pain, the swims and the silence lives a longing for balance.
To dare to pause, to dare to be without words for a while – that is perhaps also a kind of strength.
Life goes on anyway, and one day both the body and the words will awaken again.


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Final Reflection

It’s as if the body and the words work together in their own way.
When one needs rest, the other carries the stillness.
I think maybe this is how life tells me to slow down a little,
to let the morning be quiet without rushing anything forward.

Perhaps it’s not about finding my way back to the words,
but about letting them find their way back to me – when the time is right.

Morgondopp i sol och rykande sjö

I live today, right now. History teaches me to rest in body and soul. Tomorrow waits out there in the future – a day I cannot live today. But what I do now can grow into something tomorrow. Right now is always, because this is where life is lived.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson

Kay Pollak blog – a misty morning by the lake with a wooden pier and a floating platform, a moment of reflection and meeting between words and nature.

When Words Find Their Echo – Kay Pollak and My Blog Journey

Sometimes, something small can make the whole day shine.
Yesterday, when I opened LinkedIn, I saw that Kay Pollak had liked my post — the one where I wrote about blog statistics and how numbers really tell stories about meetings between words and people.

Read this post in Swedish. ->När orden får gensvar – om möten, statistik och Kay Pollak

For a moment, I paused.
Not because a “like” is such a big thing, but because it came from someone whose words have followed me for years.
Someone who has reminded me that we choose our own thoughts, our perspectives, and our reactions.
He’s the voice in my head that keeps whispering that my happiness is my own responsibility — and that I create it by choosing thoughts that give me more joy.


When Numbers Become Stories

I’ve watched my blog’s statistics grow week by week. But when I look at the numbers now, I no longer see numbers.
I see encounters — small digital footprints of people who paused for a moment in my everyday life.
Maybe someone smiled. Maybe someone recognized themselves.

That’s what makes writing alive — when words land, awaken something, and become part of someone else’s thoughts.

And yesterday, when Kay Pollak pressed “like,” it became a symbol of exactly that.
A small confirmation that what I write truly reflects his message: that our thoughts create our world.


To Keep Choosing Joy

That small moment reminded me why I write.
Not for numbers, not for statistics — but for the conversation between the lines.
To share something genuine.
To create quiet meetings between people, even in the noise of the digital world.

So thank you, Kay. And thank you to everyone who reads.
You remind me that words have power — and that it’s always worth choosing joy, even in the smallest of ways.


On the Bridge Toward Stillness

I walk out on the wooden bridge toward the calm water — a moment of reflection and the meeting between words and silence.


A wooden pier stretching out into a softly waving sea – a moment of reflection, calm, and the meeting between words and silence.
A wooden pier stretching out into a softly waving sea – a moment of reflection, calm, and the meeting between words and silence.

About Kay Pollak’s Workshop – and My Own Choice

I know that Kay Pollak is currently holding a weekend workshop — one I’ve been thinking for a long time about joining.
It would have been exciting, to meet myself deeply in that space, where both words and silence speak equally strong.

But not this time.
Instead, I chose to invest in my training to become a conversation therapist, a decision I made just a few days ago.
Kay’s workshop was tempting, but it’s an expensive course, and right now my finances don’t allow for another investment.

Or perhaps it’s me who doesn’t allow it — because I’ve already chosen to put my resources into another kind of journey, one that’s also about understanding, meeting, and growing.

It feels a bit double. A part of me would have loved to sit there, in the middle of his workshop, listening and reflecting.
At the same time, I know that the path I’ve chosen now is mine — and that it too leads to a meeting with myself.
Maybe there will be more chances, maybe not. Kay is getting older, and I feel an ambivalence knowing I might miss the opportunity.
But for now, this is how life looks, and I choose to feel gratitude for what I do have the chance to do.
Still, it would have been such a beautiful thing to attend a workshop with Kay Pollak.


Reflection

Sometimes we don’t need grand gestures.
Sometimes, a single little click — a like — is enough to awaken something big inside.
It’s not about validation, but about recognition.
About understanding that what we send out into the world actually lands somewhere.
And it also reminds me that I carry a great responsibility for what I send out.


Question for You

When was the last time you had one of those small moments of joy — one that meant more than you first thought?


AHA – The Insight

It doesn’t take much to create meaning.
A single “like” can become a little lantern in the dark — a reminder that what we share truly reaches someone.
Maybe that’s how life works: we plant tiny seeds of words, thoughts, and warmth — and sometimes, when we least expect it, something blooms.


Between the Lines

Behind numbers, statistics, and blogs, there’s always a person who longs to be understood.
I don’t write to be seen, but to share something true.
And when someone — like Kay Pollak — sees that, it becomes a quiet “I understand.”
Right there, in that moment of recognition, something big happens.


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Closing Words

Morgondopp i sol och rykande sjö

Yesterday has already settled down in history, and tomorrow waits further ahead.
But right now — this is where life happens.
Carina Ikonen Nilsson

Morning Dip and Everyday Joy – Today and Yesterday

Morning dip and everyday joy became the start of my day. It began in the sofa with a post that disappeared, but instead of irritation I chose gratitude and lessons learned. The swim today filled me with energy, the thoughts of my grandchildren opened both sorrow and gratitude, and the bedroom now waits to be cleaned until it smells of soap. Yesterday was a day of household chores, pride, and pain – but also joy in the little things.

morning dip and everyday joy at the lake on an autumn morning

Läs det här på Svenska->Morgondopp och vardagsglädje


Today – a Morning in the Sofa

The morning began in the sofa, with coffee beside me and the computer on my lap. I wrote an entire post – hours passed – and then everything vanished. At first I wanted to curse, blame the computer, mutter a bad word. But instead I paused and told myself: “Now you need to be a responsible adult.”

That shifted my thoughts. I realized I hadn’t saved properly and that I need to be better at always checking before shutting down. And perhaps I need to accept that words often come when I bathe, not right when I wake up. A morning lesson in patience, simply put.


Today – Morning Dip and Everyday Joy

This morning I went for a dip. My bathing sisters swam, but I floated still, letting the water carry me. I watched the trees, the sky, and all the beauty right there in that moment.

The feeling was powerful. My soul filled with light, my body with energy. Gratitude settled in: “I give myself these mornings where I wake together with nature.”

Two squirrels chased each other in the trees – lively little reminders of everyday joy. Before the swim, I even managed to record a short video for TikTok. In that video, an important insight landed: A good day is one you create yourself. I am the scriptwriter of my life. My thoughts give birth to feelings, and those feelings create the day.


Today – Thoughts of My Grandchildren

After the swim came thoughts of my grandchildren, the ones I no longer get to meet. There lives sorrow, and it hurts. But I told myself I needed to change the tone of those thoughts.

Instead, I chose to feel gratitude for the time we actually had together. Me and my son. Me and my grandchildren. All those days that were ours before he chose to shut me out as both mother and grandmother.

I carry so many beautiful memories. Memories of caring for Hugo when he was sick, holding his little hand, sitting and reading with him. Memories of Emilia, my princess – always wise, always close, a wonderful friend in a small body. And my son – whom I am so proud of. His wisdom, his words, his thoughts, shared so generously through the years.

The time that is now I cannot change. It is what it is. But I have the memories. And they fill my heart with gratitude for the time that was. This is my work: to choose gratitude for what was, and let that gratitude fill my time now.


Today – the Bedroom Waiting for Soap and Order

After the swim and those thoughts, the desire for the next project grew. Today, our bedroom will be made fresh with the scent of soap. The walls will be wiped down, the paintings dusted both front and back, perfume bottles polished, flowers refreshed. Every detail tended to, until the room feels truly clean.

I can already sense it: the lightness in my body, the bubbling joy and the deep gratitude when everything is done. Walking into a room that smells of soap is like giving myself a new beginning.


Yesterday – Everyday and KonMari

Yesterday was different. The day filled with chores. I went down to the laundry room, folded clothes and ironed what needed it. With the KonMari method, every piece of clothing has its place. It’s almost silly how happy I feel opening a wardrobe and seeing that order.


Yesterday – Pride at the School Meeting

In the afternoon, it was time for my little boy’s school meeting. I told him: “This is probably the best meeting I have ever been to.”

He hasn’t even been in school for a full year, but he has already succeeded so well in all subjects. When he asked why, the answer was simple: “You, of course. You’re the one making this work.”


Yesterday – When the Body Said Stop

After the meeting, I stopped to shop, still happy from the day. But when I placed the milk into the basket – bang! My neck gave way. The pain returned, almost like the nerve pain I sometimes feel in my legs.

At home, I cooked: fish sticks, rice with curry and salt, and my cold sauce with yogurt, mayonnaise, pickled relish, and spices. My little boy ate with joy – that always warms my heart. Myself, I finally had to give in. The neck had the last word yesterday.


Reflection

Perhaps this is what life is – a mix of swimming in the lake, the scent of soap, the pride of a child, and the pain of a neck. Everything fits into a single day, and everything is allowed to be as it is.


AHA – Between the Lines

Between the lines, the choice becomes clear. I choose not to remain in irritation or sorrow, but to see lessons, everyday joy, and gratitude. It is in the small choices, in the moments, that life truly shifts.


Your Voice: Between the Lines

I am a person who carries both joy and pain. I care for my home, my family, and myself, even when my body says stop. It’s not only the cleaning or the swim that matter – it’s the feeling that I choose to live my life, every day, in my own way. That is healing, and there gratitude is born.


A Thought on Gratitude

I often sit and wonder what to cook today. And right there, my thoughts make a somersault – because in that question lives gratitude. I get to think about what to cook, not if I can cook anything at all. There are parents wondering whether they can even serve food today. I have the privilege of choosing. And there, gratitude lives in abundance.


Closing Words

Yesterday no longer exists except in memories, tomorrow is something we may experience, but right now – in this very moment – is the only place life can be lived. It is in the now that memories can be created.
Carina Ikonen Nilsson

Morgondopp i sol och rykande sjö

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Choose Thoughts and Self-Love – the First Day of the Rest of My Life

A morning with coffee, silence, and conscious thoughts. Here I share how I practice choosing thoughts and self-love, and how an astrology-based planning calendar for the coming year can become a gentle compass.

Läs det här på Svenska –Välja tankar och själv­kärlek – första dagen på resten av mitt liv


Choose thoughts and self-love – my morning routine

Thank you for letting me wake up to the first day of the rest of my life. My coffee cup stands beside me, half filled with strong coffee and topped with creamy foam. Therefore, the start of the day feels extra warm.

The house is quiet, giving me space to be alone with my thoughts. Even though less helpful thoughts sometimes appear, I quickly return to the kind ones. So every morning becomes a chance to choose thoughts and self-love again.

“Thoughts are just thoughts and have nothing to do with reality. They are formed in me, by me, and do not have to be true just because I think them.”

How do you handle wandering thoughts? Did you know you can also choose thoughts that nurture rather than harm you?


Choosing thoughts and self-love – supported by research

Research clearly shows that we can influence our thoughts and well-being:

  • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) teaches that many feelings come from automatic, often negative thoughts. By identifying, questioning, and restructuring them, we can feel better.
  • The method of cognitive restructuring therefore helps us replace harmful thoughts with ones that are truer and more supportive.
  • Mindfulness shows that we can observe thoughts without getting caught in them, which allows us to regain calm.

Read more about CBT on 1177 ➜


Book tips to deepen self-love

These books can further guide you when you want to choose thoughts and self-love:

  • The Power of Now – Eckhart Tolle
  • Wherever You Go, There You Are – Jon Kabat-Zinn
  • Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself – Dr. Joe Dispenza
  • The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem – Nathaniel Branden

Planning calendar – future support for choosing thoughts

In yesterday’s post I wrote about the astrology-based planning calendar designed for next year.
If you buy it through this link and use the discount code Astrocalendar30, you’ll receive 30 % off.

It’s not an affiliate link, just a link of goodwill. I haven’t started working with the calendar yet, but I believe it will gradually help me schedule pauses and choose thoughts and self-love more consciously.

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Gratitude and Astrology


First day of the rest of my life – gratitude and a gift to share

Self-love is not only gentle words. It is also actions: acknowledging needs, setting boundaries, and choosing thoughts that truly nourish.

Whenever I notice a self-critical thought, I pause and ask, “What would I say to a friend in the same situation?” Therefore, I give that answer to myself.

The planning calendar can in addition serve as a daily reminder to choose thoughts and self-love.


A day of rest and self-care

Yesterday there was no refreshing lake swim for me. My neck ached and brought a headache that was hard to bear. So I spent the day in bed.

Fortunately, we have adjustable beds and a projector in the bedroom. While awake, I watched movies: The Godfather, a film about a boarding school, a medieval story with Richard Gere, and one about a brain surgeon. I may not have seen every film to the end—I kept falling asleep—but this became my way of caring for myself.

Later our stay-at-home son went out to buy Thai food for us. The little one spent the day with a friend and came home happy and tired. My husband left early for Gothenburg to photograph horses at the Åby race track and returned late, eager to edit his pictures.

Finally, I realized that even though I’d been unwell, it had still been the best day of my life. Why? Because I chose it to be. I allowed myself to rest, took my medicine, enjoyed good films, and gave my body the care it needed.


AHA – Between the Lines

Reading my own words, I see how the choice of thoughts and self-love shapes the entire story. From the aroma of morning coffee to the quiet of a sick day, I choose again and again a path that gives strength. This isn’t escape—it’s the courage to invest my energy where life grows.


Reflection

Taking responsibility for my thoughts is taking responsibility for my life. Even when my body says stop, the day can still be the best—simply because I choose it.

Morning swim in sun and steaming lake

Yesterday has already settled into history, tomorrow waits farther ahead. But right now—this is where life happens.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson


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training to become a therapist

The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Gratitude and Astrology

Morning reflection on how words can transform an entire day.
Here I share gratitude, new possibilities, and an unexpected gift: 30 % off an astrological planning calendar.

Read this post in Swedish ->Första dagen på resten av mitt liv – tacksamhet och en gåva att dela


Taste the Words – How Do They Feel?

Today is the first day of the rest of my life.
Just today is the best day of my life.
Let the words linger—how do they feel?
Please share your thoughts in a comment.

Almost every day begins like this for me—with gratitude for having received yet another morning.
Not everyone is given the gift of waking up.
I also treasure the quiet hours in front of my screen when words slowly settle into place.
That is why every morning feels like a true new beginning.


The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Words That Make a Difference

I used to say this sentence often to the young people I worked with.
At first, they didn’t quite grasp its meaning or see how powerful it was.
But after a while they would come back and say:

“Carina, you know what—today is the first day of the rest of our lives.”

Such words grow stronger in the present.
They help us pause, take responsibility for the day, and create many “best days” in life.


The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Gratitude and Astrology

An Email That Turned into a Gift

Yesterday I received an email from a writer I have followed for a long time.
She writes for Amilia, has published several books, and sends inspiring weekly letters about the movements of the planets.

I wanted to give something back for all the texts I’ve enjoyed.
So I wrote her an email explaining that I blog in Swedish and, for some months now, also in English—reaching readers around the world.
I offered to include a link to her Astrological Planning Calendar 2026 as a thank-you.

Her reply was warm and generous.
She gave me both a link and a personal discount code to share with you.

Use Astrocalendar30 to get 30 % off when you order through the link I provide.

This collaboration brings me no payment.
It is simply my gratitude flowing forward—and a way for you to start planning your year with the guidance of the stars.


About the Author of the Calendar

Fact Box
Name: Helena Biehl
Profession: Astrologer and author, active on Amilia and beyond.
Known for: Inspiring weekly letters about planetary movements, widely read in Sweden and internationally.
Latest work: Astrological Planning Calendar 2026, now also available in English.


The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Gratitude and Astrology
The First Day of the Rest of My Life – Gratitude and Astrology

My Next Step

I haven’t started filling in the calendar yet, but I look forward to writing down key dates and planetary movements.
For me, it will be another way to live each day as the first day of the rest of my life.


A Question for You

How do these words feel to you?
Today is the first day of the rest of your life.
Share your reflections in a comment—I read every one.


AHA – Reflection

When I write about the first day of the rest of my life, I hear my own voice reminding me: now is what truly counts.
I cannot change yesterday, and tomorrow hasn’t arrived yet.
Just today I can choose how to live—again and again.
That is my AHA moment: every morning is a new starting point, no matter how simple it seems.


Between the Lines – My Voice

What shines through here is gratitude and a desire to give forward.
I begin the day with words that open the heart, and when the chance came to share a gift with you, it felt natural.
It says something about me: I feel most alive when my own little “thank you” can become a bridge to others.


Morning dip and gratitude – a cold lake swim in soft mist on a frosty autumn morning, person in wool hat floating peacefully as first sunlight breaks over the water."

Yesterday has already settled into history, tomorrow waits further ahead.
But right now—this is where life happens.
– Carina Ikonen Nilsson


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