This is a small everyday story about self-compassion in everyday life – about listening to the body when it says stop.
I think of it as warming the soul.
As compassion itself.
Läs det här inläggetn på Svenska ->Knät, vilan och self-compassion i praktiken
When the body says stop – and I actually listen
Today I woke up late, but that didn’t matter because my knee has started acting up.
That aching knee says: no swimming right now. Now it’s time to rest.
On Sunday we were in town, walking around and looking at art. That meant a lot of steps.
On Monday I went swimming and was quite active around the house afterwards.
Already then I could feel that my knee hurt a bit, but I thought: it will pass.
Yesterday that knee made itself known again, and it was hard to go down to the basement.
In the evening it really hurt and felt warm.
Today it still feels warm and hurts just as much, so today – to take care of that aching knee – there will be no swimming.
The unexpected: I don’t see this as a failure
Instead, I’m going to take care of my studies.
Even though the rest of my body says it would feel good to go swimming.
I give myself self-compassion in this decision, even if it’s “only” physical.
And at the same time I notice that I don’t actually experience this as a failure –
but rather as a success.
Because I am listening to my body.
The inner dialogue – where something new actually happened
The part of me that wants to be a good girl, to be diligent and perform,
I feed her with thoughts like:
It’s good that you want to go swimming,
but right now the wisest thing is to rest your knee.We’ll swim on Friday instead.
Today we stay home and study –
that’s also a good thing to do.
This might sound banal.
But for me, it isn’t.
When theory becomes practice – self-compassion in everyday life (CFT)
I’ve been studying Compassion-Focused Therapy (CFT) lately.
And one of the core ideas there is that we humans have three different emotional regulation systems:
- The threat system
(fear, pressure, criticism, “you’re not good enough”) - The drive system
(achievement, goals, diligence, tempo) - The soothing system
(care, calm, warmth, kindness toward oneself)
What struck me today was this:
I chose the soothing system.
And it was right there that I understood what
self-compassion in everyday life actually means to me.
Not by lying down and giving up.
But by:
- listening to my body
- making a long-term wise decision
- speaking kindly to my inner “good girl” instead of running her over
That is exactly what CFT means by self-compassion in practice.
Not kindness as escape.
But kindness as wisdom.
An old pattern I didn’t follow
The old me would have said:
It’s probably nothing.
I should swim anyway.
I mustn’t lose momentum.
And the result would most likely have been:
- worse inflammation
- a longer break
- more frustration
- more self-criticism
Today I did something else.
I stopped.
I rested.
I chose studying instead.
And I did it without beating myself up.
The quiet breakthrough
This is not some big dramatic breakthrough.
No Instagram-friendly transformation.
Just a small everyday moment where something actually landed.
That self-compassion is not a thought.
It is a behavior.
A tone of voice inward.
A choice.
Reflection
Maybe this is what healing actually looks like.
Not never being in pain.
Not always being strong.
But beginning to respond to life’s small signals
with dignity instead of violence.
Toward the body.
Toward oneself.
To you who are reading
Is there some small place in your life right now
where your body, your heart, or your energy has already said:
“Slow down a little.”
And where you actually know what would be wisest –
but still keep pushing?
What would it sound like
if you spoke to yourself the way I spoke to my inner good girl today?
Self-compassion in everyday life – a morning that turned out just right
Presence in everyday life – swimming, soup and time
Listening to the body in everyday life – pause, fermentation and presence
Final words
I listened to my body.
And it turned out to be a success.
Live today, right now.
Yesterday rests in history,
and tomorrow waits somewhere further ahead.
Right now is where life is happening.
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